Nonie Darwish and Miri Eisen couldn't be more different.

Darwish is the daughter of a former member of the Egyptian intelligence service who directed guerrilla attacks against Israelis in the 1950s. Her father, Lt. Col. Mustafa Hafaz, was killed by a special Israeli assassination team.

Eisen was born in San Rafael and moved to Israel with her family when she was 8. She was drafted into the army, like most young Israelis. She got out, got a degree, and returned to the military as a career intelligence officer. She retired as a colonel.

But the two women are both mothers, and they both want peace in the Middle East.

"There are moderate Arabs in the world, and this is one mother who loves her children but also loves Israel's children," said Darwish, speaking of herself.

"Israel is a democracy with lots of warts and pimples," said Eisen. "But if we reach out and teach our children, and if Nonie teaches her children, and if other mothers hear us and think about what they say to their kids, we really can make a difference.

"We can make a better future for our kids so that even if we won't be able to live it, they will."

Darwish, 57, and Eisen, 35, are touring the country as "Mothers for Peace" under the sponsorship of the Israel Project, a nonprofit agency whose mission is to promote peace and security, as well as educate the media about Israel. They have spoken in Washington, D.C., New York, Atlanta, New Jersey and in San Jose on Tuesday. They will speak at an invitation-only lunch today at the Westin St. Francis hotel.

The mothers, both of whom have three children, have also spoken in Israel. Eisen noted that their activities are pretty much limited to Israel and the United States, even though their message is perhaps more appropriately aimed at the Muslim world.

"Dialogue in the Arab world has already begun, but moderate voices are struck down," Darwish said. "I call on all Muslims to come forward and be heard and to work for peace, for the sake of our children."

Darwish said she was raised to hate Jews. And Palestinian children today are taught to hate, and to glorify the "martyrs" who kill and die for the Palestinian cause.

Eisen said she has seen the textbooks and visited the classrooms, where the photos of martyrs line the walls.

"When the children see these photos and what they stand for, it encourages them to follow in those footsteps," Eisen said.

Darwish said the culture of hate plays into the politics of the region, even as it destroys the lives of innocents. She said there have been some Arab journalists who have started to speak out in favor of peace, but not enough. She said she gets a lot of comments at her online forum, from Muslims who also want peace, but are afraid to speak out.

"We even had two Saudis write in," she said. "Imagine that, Saudis! But, of course, they both had to say, 'Please don't publish my name.' "

Darwish said she doesn't want to "bash Islam."

"As a matter of fact, terrorists are hurting Islam," she said. "They are giving Islam a bad name, and that hurts me. That's why I'm speaking out."

Eisen stressed that neither she nor Darwish are political, that they have no specific political message to bring.

"We're not saying here now, 'Here's the solution to the Israeli-Palestinian conflict,' " she said. "I haven't figured that one out yet. But I do believe that by standing up and talking, we can make a difference.

"Within my own community, I think we have heard more extreme voices of Israel over the last few years, on both sides. We need regular people to stand up, not in a political way, just to stand up and talk about what we teach our children.

Both women said they had mixed emotions about the recent Palestinian elections, won by the hard-line group, Hamas.

Eisen said it's disturbing that the Palestinians would elect a party that still calls for the destruction of Israel. But she said no one was more surprised at the victory than Hamas' leaders.

"Politics is all about compromise, and I think it was easier for them to do what they do from the outside," Eisen said. "But now Hamas is going to have to be on the inside, and respond to the people. I think they'll be forced to compromise, and that could be a good thing."

Darwish said the Palestinian group Fatah also started out as a terrorist organization, but that faded into the background after Fatah was given leadership.

"I hope now Hamas will change because they have to be politicians," Darwish said. "They have to rule. They have to face more media. They have to answer, internally and externally, for everything they do.

"So I have hope, but that shows you how much we are in desperate need of reform in the Arab world."